For those of you who read my previous post Found my mojo! I've decided to give ye all a quick update on what's been happening since. Contestant number three, currently re-named Mr. Right Now has kept in touch and we've been out for dinner and / or drinks each weekend since! Don't misconstrue the name Mr. Right Now - I am not using him or simply making do till something better comes along. It's simply that right now is all I can think about. I just want to see what happens - I'm taking my own advice and taking it easy, not rushing into anything and not reading too much into the situation.
He's lovely, kind, considerate, easy-going, good company and not jealous (can't stand jealous men - as I usually say, no-one's tried to run away with me so far, I'm hardly going to become an irresistable sex siren just 'cos I happen be dating!). However, I did have to have the chat about me wanting to take things easy. I just felt he is getting more involved than I am and whilst I don't want to run scared neither do I want to hurt someone so genuine and kind. It's a delicate balance and hopefully I'm managing to keep things on an even keel at the minute.
Whilst we get on very well, the lack of things in common does concern me a little. Also, he's really quiet - which makes it quite strange that he's taken with me seeing as I could never be described as quiet - unless someone gagged me (I'm not suggesting that by the way!). That said I do enjoy his company plus I can be sure he wants to be out with me as he can't blame beer goggles etc. seeing as he doesn't really drink.
One of the things I've noticed is that my mojo is apparently still good. Whilst out on Saturday night a guy who I had a brief thing with years ago and have stayed relatively friendly with, took it upon himself to inform Mr. Right Now that I was a fantastic woman, one of the best (he did however add the proviso, "if you can tame her!" - not sure where that came from, I've never been exactly wild, although I suppose I can be headstrong!). Also, I've just been chatted up so much more than I have ever been in my life in the last few weeks and that started before Mr. Right Now. Maybe it's the fact that I am in my thirties and don't actually worry as much about what people think (of course I still do, but like in my twenties!). Perhaps you just grow into your own skin a little more.
Anyway, will keep you informed but at the moment my biggest problem is that I'm absolutely knackered - I haven't had so many nights out in a long time!
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7 comments:
It is sounding lovely - enjoy.
Don't worry about him being quiet and you not.... same could be said about me and mine but we've lasted this long. We do have a lot in common but have had completely different lives and maybe it is the same for you and Mr Right Now?
Really good if you can hold back, I just hope he doesn't become too clingy. A real desire is rather nice though.
Once agan - I hope you enjoy yourself :-)
Thanks Doris, not so much worried about the quiet bit as not having a lot in common. Our lives have been very different.
I've travelled more, studied more etc. Plus the things I love to discuss and debate reading, current affairs, the state of the world in general don't seem to be things that are on his radar.
However, a lot of our attitudes to things are similiar and he is good company (when you get him going!)
Will simply take it easy and reckon I'll know myself which way to proceed.
Ah, I remember my Mr Right Now from my student days. A friend who I ended up drunkenly snogging one hogmany. For weeks and then months I ran scared, not wanting anything heavy, and then suddenly things all changed and I found myself head over heels! We were together for two and a half year (my longest relationship thus far!) and eventually broke up because he moved to London and I wasn't in a position to go with him. I still wonder if he was actually Mr Right and if I should have heeded London Calling! Sometimes Mr Right Now just takes a wee bit of time to become Mr Right...
I do understand your concerns re having a lot in common though. There are several "markers" that I'll always stand by - similar upbringing and educational background are the main ones for me as I really do believe that if those things don't match up, in my experience, it's asking for trouble. A love of Morrissey always helps too!
CatGirl, a love of Morrissey wouldn't be a top priority for me ;-) but the other pointers are. Our upbringings would be very similiar but our educational backgrounds very different so watch this space.
I love your insight: maybe I'm growing more comfortable in my own skin... Long may that continue. May you grow more and more into yourself and be delighted by what you find on your way. If you team up with someone on the way, you'll be fine, provided you don't stop growing into yourself. Since you are so clearly an educational person, I'd like to recommend a writer I haven't read: Jung. I've just finished listening to a book about him. He had a lot to say about growing into yourself. Thanks for returning to this theme: I was wondering.
Omani, don't think I could ever be with anyone who stopped one from growing. Jung sounds a bit daunting, touched on some of his stuff in college - not sure if I'm up to it for light reading but stranger things have happened.
Glad to have finally filled you in on the gossip - keep watching this space - I like a bit of suspense!
Thanks ffor the post
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